Changes

The past year has brought a lot of changes for me and my family: changes in employment and status, a change of location, time zone, climate... Sister Hazel's song "Change Your Mind" would make an appropriate theme song (if only the past year had been as filled with uplift and optimism as the song is!)

Like most times of change it has been painful, full of fear and resentment, and I'm glad it's over.

Several of my friends have pointed out the obvious fact that January 1 is not a magical day; that the practice of making Resolutions at the New Year is a questionable one - why should we limit ourselves to one day of striving for better things? I get that, and I do agree that we should set both long- and short-term goals throughout the year, and re-think them as often as necessary, not just once a year.

Still, it's hard to face a new year without hoping for better things. Conscious changes have to begin somewhere, and New Year's Day is as good a place to start as any. I like the idea that we're all standing together at our own starting lines, waiting for the gun (which sounds a lot like the "pop" of a bottle of sparkling wine at midnight.) We're all running our own races, but we're starting together - me, and my friends - at least the ones who still believe in New Year's magic - and all the people out there that I don't know and may never meet. I like the idea of joining in a ritual that is shared by so many.

For me, this year will be about getting acclimated to the Northwest. I look forward to learning more about the ways and habits of Portland and adapting them to my own lifestyle. I was excited about moving here, and I love it here - but the longer I live here, the more I discover how much of a Southerner I really am.

I want to start painting again. I started a new project last night, and had a great time working on it. I want to get back to all my artwork: painting, digital, all of it. I want to start classes again, preferably at the Art Institute here in Portland; Ken really wants me to start again right away, but I want to make sure we can pay our regular bills before I start worrying about affording books and software. I also want to get back into the habit of journaling - this blog has been very neglected, and I want to re-work it and try to find a new theme. I am going to try to write something every day, whether online or on paper. Just something.

I'm sure there will be more changes ahead. Maybe before another year is over, I will again be able to look forward to change.